Chazster
Joined Tue 08/28/07
Posts: 2477
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| Topic: update on those that remember |
Thu 10/30/08 04:12 AM |
Well, this is most likely the end. I went to her place last night and things started off well. She was even kissing me. Anyway, I asked if I could accompany her to a party this weekend and she said no. She then freaked out because she really cares about what others will think if we dated and she is 28, I am 23, and we meet because she is my tutor.
She said that is too much for her.
She also said that all those things she said in her message were real and that she cares about me and doesn't think she can just be friends. I was there from 9-12:30.
I told her I couldn't be mad at her even though she wanted me to and I still wanted her to be my tutor. I said I just pitied her because she would risk losing something precious because of something trivial. She tried to apologize but I told her the only thing I regretted was that I was not older.
As I tried to leave she grabbed me and just repeated mate (which is japanese for stop.. she said other things but i dont know what they were) She followed me down the stairs and onto the porch where for about 5 times when i tried to leave she grabbed my arm and pulled me back.
I told her not to do anything that would make her feel more guilty (even though i really wanted the kiss she longed for) and that even though I doubt she would ever get over those fears, she knew where to find me if she did.
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Chazster
Joined Tue 08/28/07
Posts: 2477
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| Topic: update on those that remember |
Wed 10/29/08 04:14 AM |
Ok, well I talked to her last night and I am going over to see her tomorrow. Basically what we are going to do is take a step back to get to know each other better. It seems that her biggest fear is that she isn't herself around me and if I find out who she really is then I wont like her and leave her and she will get hurt. (thats what it seems anyway).
I do think that she finally understands that I dont care about the age difference though. Even when she says things like she is really not that good of a person and i wont like her she is still kind of gigglie on the phone.
I am just going to chill out, spend time with her, and over time as she begins to see I still care about her I think the other issues will be less important. |
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Chazster
Joined Tue 08/28/07
Posts: 2477
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| Topic: update on those that remember |
Tue 10/28/08 04:10 PM |
QUOTE:
Wow, thanks for making a mockery of my pain. I only posted all that to show why I think she cares so much about me. That is her original writing with no editing. |
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Chazster
Joined Tue 08/28/07
Posts: 2477
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| Topic: update on those that remember |
Tue 10/28/08 03:58 PM |
Well, she called me last night and said we couldnt date because she was my tutor and because she is 28 (which I didn't know but I dont care). She said she really cares about meand if it was not for the age or the tutoring we would date. Her phone died after an hour and a half and she called me later, but I told her I was sleeping (cause I was). She then wrote me this email.
I hope you are not upset with me from our conversation tonight.
You are a really nice, sincere, honest person.
I already deceived you, took advantage over you by hiding who really I am. I also, exploited your kindness and affection only for my pleasure.
I am really sorry about that.
I guess, if I choose whatever 'I' like to do as I want, it would lead you into the dead end which deprive all of great, precious possibilities and qualities you have now. I should not do that. Even if you say you do not mind, still I know it is not a right thing for you. I do mind to let you do things which just ruin you and your life. And if, I, or because of me, you turn your life in that way, I cannot help blaming myself.
I still dream about chatting, laughing with you, and sometimes kissing you when I find you really cute, relaxing, laying next to and feeling each other close. But, it's really a selfish dream, which I should have not made it true.
Since the last weekend, after the movie, I was wishing, 'if it is dream, never wake me up, and if it is not dream, never let me sleep.' :) But, surely it was too good to happen, so, I had to wake up. I met a really nice person who I can trust and respect, and he likes me without any reason and under any condition, and he tells me he does. Do you believe such a thing can really happen? Honestly, I miss you a lot. And... I know I shouldn't. I am not sure, I can stay away from you, not thinking about you. It would be painful, when you behave as a normal friend, no more interested in me. Still, I have to deal with it, because, it should never had happened to me from the start.
I really wish, if I could be free from all of my concerns. If I was younger, American, not your tutor, or totally different person who does not care about these things at all,... But this is me, very unfortunately. It looks now is around the time you realize who really I am. More serious, kind and honest you are to me, more guilty I feel. If you were the person who just plays the games, I might feel less guilty. But, if you were that kind a person, I might not have been interested in you at all.
I cannot hug you anymore? No? That's really...
Sorry about this message. But this is what I am thinking now. I guess, soon you will find me as a pathetic loser, with your truly gorgeous girlfriend. And, it is sadly true me.
I dont know what to do. It seems she really cares for me and I care for her but this isnt going to happen. |
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Chazster
Joined Tue 08/28/07
Posts: 2477
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| Topic: update on those that remember |
Mon 10/27/08 01:09 PM |
QUOTE:
Better to take a while and enjoy it then to rush and find that it is not all as seems.
Thats why I wrote her an email today saying we dont have to decide anything or label our relationship as anything. I am just happy how things are. |
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Chazster
Joined Tue 08/28/07
Posts: 2477
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| Topic: update on those that remember |
Mon 10/27/08 04:15 AM |
QUOTE:
QUOTE:
QUOTE:
QUOTE:
QUOTE:
awww that is so nice for you doll, just don't rush things 
I wasnt the one setting the pace lol. Apparently we had both been in the same boat, no knowing if the other person liked us, and even before I came upstairs she didn't know if she wanted to date because I was her student. I kind of sat down and held her and then she wanted to hug, well it was a pretty passionate hug and it kind of moved on from there. (that being said, I am not sure if we are dating, but I am not going to press the subject right now)
She would always ask me if I thought it was too far, and even told me if I regretted in the morning that I could just pretend it was a dream, yet I explained I was right where I wanted to be.
IDK, this was just a way better experience than I could have hoped for. Like, I could have had sex, but that wasn't what was on my mind (if you get what I am saying). Maybe there is something really special about this one, only time will tell.
Dude. Two things that you said " I was right where I wanted to be " and sex wasn't what was on your mind at that point, shows a lot about how much you actually do like her.
When you can be with someone, and feel the way you did when you were there, that is a level that is sometimes really tough to find.
Best of luck, man.
Thanks, she was supposed to be too busy to see me today, but she called and said she missed me and was wondering if I could go see her for an hour. So I am going to do that tonight. 
ANd how far do you have to go to see her for that hour??
About 7 miles. That one hour ended up being 4.5. Apparently she still doesnt know if she wants to date me. From what she tells me, in her eyes, relationships always end and she doesnt want to lose me. She also doesnt know if she can be my gf and my tutor.
I told her she doesnt have to decide now since we havent known each other that long, but I did say if we went down the friends road we wouldn't be able to do all the other stuff we have been doing (making out, and all that other stuff that I dont need to go into detail about).
(apparently she had a bad relationship with the other white guy she dated and told me she was traumatized by it. She said I kind of reminder her of him because he was also a nice guy. This might take a while *sigh*) |
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Chazster
Joined Tue 08/28/07
Posts: 2477
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| Topic: update on those that remember |
Sun 10/26/08 01:21 PM |
QUOTE:
QUOTE:
QUOTE:
awww that is so nice for you doll, just don't rush things
I wasnt the one setting the pace lol. Apparently we had both been in the same boat, no knowing if the other person liked us, and even before I came upstairs she didn't know if she wanted to date because I was her student. I kind of sat down and held her and then she wanted to hug, well it was a pretty passionate hug and it kind of moved on from there. (that being said, I am not sure if we are dating, but I am not going to press the subject right now)
She would always ask me if I thought it was too far, and even told me if I regretted in the morning that I could just pretend it was a dream, yet I explained I was right where I wanted to be.
IDK, this was just a way better experience than I could have hoped for. Like, I could have had sex, but that wasn't what was on my mind (if you get what I am saying). Maybe there is something really special about this one, only time will tell.
Dude. Two things that you said " I was right where I wanted to be " and sex wasn't what was on your mind at that point, shows a lot about how much you actually do like her.
When you can be with someone, and feel the way you did when you were there, that is a level that is sometimes really tough to find.
Best of luck, man.
Thanks, she was supposed to be too busy to see me today, but she called and said she missed me and was wondering if I could go see her for an hour. So I am going to do that tonight. |
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Chazster
Joined Tue 08/28/07
Posts: 2477
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| Topic: update on those that remember |
Sun 10/26/08 08:10 AM |
QUOTE:
awww that is so nice for you doll, just don't rush things
I wasnt the one setting the pace lol. Apparently we had both been in the same boat, no knowing if the other person liked us, and even before I came upstairs she didn't know if she wanted to date because I was her student. I kind of sat down and held her and then she wanted to hug, well it was a pretty passionate hug and it kind of moved on from there. (that being said, I am not sure if we are dating, but I am not going to press the subject right now)
She would always ask me if I thought it was too far, and even told me if I regretted in the morning that I could just pretend it was a dream, yet I explained I was right where I wanted to be.
IDK, this was just a way better experience than I could have hoped for. Like, I could have had sex, but that wasn't what was on my mind (if you get what I am saying). Maybe there is something really special about this one, only time will tell.
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Chazster
Joined Tue 08/28/07
Posts: 2477
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| Topic: update on those that remember |
Sun 10/26/08 07:56 AM |
Those that remember that I kind of had a thing for my japanese tutor but had no idea how she felt, this is an update.
So last night she came over and stayed hanging out and watching movies and talking for say 11 hours lol. I brought her home and she sat in the car for a while and was kind of asking about hugging etc. Based on some discussion we had earlier I was curious if she wanted more but was shy or indecisive. I ended up telling her that I liked her and grabbed her hand, she thought about it and ended up inviting me in.
We didn't got all the way ( i think the only reason was my lack of a condom). Man, just the stuff she whispered in my ear and then her random expression in japanese (which were funny because sometimes I knew what they meant and she got embarrased)
So I had dropped her off at 1 and it was about 4 and I wanted to stay, and she wanted me to stay, but she had lots of work to do and wasnt sure it was a good idea. So she held me and kissed me for a while in the room, then outside the door to her aprt again, then came after me at the bottom of the stairs to do it again and between breathes she whispered how glad she was that she was finally able to kiss me.
All and all a good day. When I first brought her home I didn't even know if she was interested and now... wow. Too bad I can't see her until Thursday. |
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Chazster
Joined Tue 08/28/07
Posts: 2477
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| Topic: natural or fake boobs |
Sat 10/25/08 06:10 AM |
| IDK, I have never exp fake boobs in person. I know I like the look of them better, but I am not sure if the action is as good. |
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Chazster
Joined Tue 08/28/07
Posts: 2477
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| Topic: Fable 2!!!! |
Thu 10/23/08 04:24 AM |
Now look what you guys made me do. I bought Fable 2. I am only around 1-2 hours into it, but I am enjoying being deliciously evil.. mwa ha ha. I think the narrator should be slightly more understanding and a little less naggy about it.
BTW I really like the whole dog thing. Its pretty cool. I enjoy just randomly playing fetch lol. |
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Chazster
Joined Tue 08/28/07
Posts: 2477
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| Topic: DONT rate my profile |
Sun 10/19/08 06:42 PM |
| He is a self hating rater. He wants his profile rated, but hates people who ask for it, so he posts here and says he doesnt want it so he can not only try to fool us, but try to fool himself. |
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Chazster
Joined Tue 08/28/07
Posts: 2477
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| Topic: Only the lonley |
Sun 10/19/08 05:06 PM |
| I am with you there. I have to wait to find out if she likes me. |
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Chazster
Joined Tue 08/28/07
Posts: 2477
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| Topic: Cultural differences |
Sun 10/19/08 06:01 AM |
QUOTE:
QUOTE:
So I just got back from dinner and a slight drive with my Japanese tutor. She is coming over tomorrow to watch movies. I kind of like her, but I have no idea if she just wants to be friends or likes me as well. She is Japanese and the cultural differences make it kind of difficult to tell. Not to mention that she is my tutor.
Anyone ever had cultural difference issues when it comes to dating?
I dated a guy for 2 years who was Hindu (he still is, I'm assuming  ) and we couldn't have been any more different. I'm Catholic by the way. We tried not to let our religious differences get in the way during our relationship but it eventually did when he decided to break up with me. Continue spending time with her and see if she's feelin' you too. Hope it works out for you! 
I am not too worried about religion. She has no religion at all and I am what I call a liberal Catholic lol.
Yes, I know about the family thing in Japan but I think she plans to live in America so it would seem slightly unlikely she would meet a Japanese guy, but yes eventually we will probably have to talk. I think it is a bit too early for that though. I want to see how things progress in the upcoming weeks. (I think that if she is interested she might talk to her american girl friends and maybe they will explain how to show interest) |
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Chazster
Joined Tue 08/28/07
Posts: 2477
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| Topic: What do you think of Gay Marriage ? |
Sat 10/18/08 01:38 PM |
QUOTE:
what gives you the right to decide to whom i may tie my monetary assets? a LEGAL marriage is not the same thing as a RELIGIOUS one.
Then would you have any problem with a legal arrangement that gave you all those rights, but just was not called "marriage"? |
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Chazster
Joined Tue 08/28/07
Posts: 2477
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| Topic: Do U feel Bad 4 Joe the Plumber ? |
Sat 10/18/08 01:29 PM |
QUOTE:
QUOTE:
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He doesnt have a plumbers liscense,he owes back taxes,and he makes less than $40,000 a year so I guess he's full of **** .
You forgot to mention that the state he is in doesnt require a plumbers license
He doesnt have a drivers license either.
Lots of people don't have a drivers license. What does that have to do with owning a plumbing company? |
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Chazster
Joined Tue 08/28/07
Posts: 2477
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| Topic: Do U feel Bad 4 Joe the Plumber ? |
Sat 10/18/08 01:27 PM |
QUOTE:
He doesnt have a plumbers liscense,he owes back taxes,and he makes less than $40,000 a year so I guess he's full of **** .
You forgot to mention that the state he is in doesnt require a plumbers license |
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Chazster
Joined Tue 08/28/07
Posts: 2477
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| Topic: What do you think of Gay Marriage ? |
Sat 10/18/08 01:24 PM |
| Marriage is more or less a religious thing. I don't think there should be gay marriage, but I am fine with a government sanctioned union that will give them all the legal rights and privileges of a married couple with just a different title. |
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Chazster
Joined Tue 08/28/07
Posts: 2477
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| Topic: Do U feel Bad 4 Joe the Plumber ? |
Sat 10/18/08 01:22 PM |
| If I were him, I would be happy. Now his argument is even further in the publics eye. Obama's tax hikes will really hurt small business owners and that was his point. |
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Chazster
Joined Tue 08/28/07
Posts: 2477
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| Topic: Explain why Socialism is |
Sat 10/18/08 01:20 PM |
Well since I am anti big government I am anti socialism. Equal distribution of wealth kind of messes up the competitiveness of some careers. Also, whats the point of going to college if you are gonna make the same money as someone who works right out of high school? This is particularly true with people that have to spend an extra 3-4 years in med school, law school, or any other advanced program.
Government taking too much power mixed with corruption = bad. V for Vendetta is a good example. |
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