tyhodge
Joined Fri 10/31/08
Posts: 189
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| Mon 11/03/08 09:13 PM |
Im not very good at writing poems and seeing this area of the forum, i would like everyone to help put a poem together to put on a drawing i made for my little one. her name is jayla rose and she is 2 right now, not sure if age would be needed in one or not. and she loves bob bob (sponge bob)
a picture of the little one.
[img]http://i78.servimg.com/u/f78/11/88/77/67/jaylar10.jpg[/img]
anyone want to help write a little poem for her bob bob picture i drew for her.
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LAMom
Joined Tue 12/12/06
Posts: 24116
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| Mon 11/03/08 09:14 PM |
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Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww she is so beautiful
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tyhodge
Joined Fri 10/31/08
Posts: 189
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| Mon 11/03/08 09:19 PM |
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QUOTE:
Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww she is so beautiful
thanks, is that the start of the poem
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RainbowTrout
Joined Fri 04/06/07
Posts: 3826
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| Mon 11/03/08 09:21 PM |
Wow! What a lil darling.
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LAMom
Joined Tue 12/12/06
Posts: 24116
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| Mon 11/03/08 09:24 PM |
No,,, Just my first thoughts when I saw her Picture,,,
Lets see what we all can do here,, Come on Family,,,,,
Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww she is so beautiful
Wow! What a lil darling
Jayla Rose all of two years old
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tyhodge
Joined Fri 10/31/08
Posts: 189
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| Mon 11/03/08 09:27 PM |
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QUOTE:
No,,, Just my first thoughts when I saw her Picture,,,
Lets see what we all can do here,, Come on Family,,,,,
Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww she is so beautiful
Wow! What a lil darling
Jayla Rose all of two years old
lol, ive thought so to and tell her all the time. its good to hear a young one tell herself shes pretty when she looks into a mirror instead of have the low self esteem problem early.
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AngelLight
Joined Sat 04/12/08
Posts: 2758
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| Mon 11/03/08 10:14 PM |
Jayla Rose,
my beautiful girl,
you are a gift,
you fill my world.
And because of this
I could not miss the
chance to make your
little heart dance.
I drew this picture
just for you because
I Love you so. I hope
you'll keep it as you
grow to capture
memories as white as
snow.
You are my baby and
you'll always be the
apple of my eye.
You make me smile
just because; never
forget how much you
are Loved!
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MsWizard
Joined Sun 07/01/07
Posts: 4084
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| Mon 11/03/08 10:14 PM |
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QUOTE:
Im not very good at writing poems and seeing this area of the forum, i would like everyone to help put a poem together to put on a drawing i made for my little one. her name is jayla rose and she is 2 right now, not sure if age would be needed in one or not. and she loves bob bob (sponge bob)
a picture of the little one.
[img]http://i78.servimg.com/u/f78/11/88/77/67/jaylar10.jpg[/img]
anyone want to help write a little poem for her bob bob picture i drew for her.
What a beautiful little cherub
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tyhodge
Joined Fri 10/31/08
Posts: 189
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| Mon 11/03/08 10:26 PM |
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QUOTE:
Jayla Rose,
my beautiful girl,
you are a gift,
you fill my world.
And because of this
I could not miss the
chance to make your
little heart dance.
I drew this picture
just for you because
I Love you so. I hope
you'll keep it as you
grow to capture
memories as white as
snow.
You are my baby and
you'll always be the
apple of my eye.
You make me smile
just because; never
forget how much you
are Loved!
i like that, pretty nice and cute.
and thanks mswizard
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tyhodge
Joined Fri 10/31/08
Posts: 189
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| Mon 11/03/08 11:38 PM |
im not good, but ill take a wack at it, what do i got to loose, lol
The one, my world
Jayla we play in
the morning, we
play before the
zzz's
A piece I always
missed, the piece
you made complete
The spot you filled,
the spot I left
blank for a beautiful
little girl like you.
Alot of memories
from your first 2
years.
Best of all having
you lay next to me in
the morning's to watch
your "Bob Bob"
Memories I'll cherish
Memories I'll never
forget
Your the one that
made me
Your the one that
keeps me modivated
Our times together
will never end
Rain or sun shine,
we'll play through
them all again and again
Just remember daddy
will always be yours'
and you will always
BE MINE!
how is that, i dont feel im that good at writing them, lol. fix anything that may sound out of place or need fixed to sound better. what you all think
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Edited by tyhodge on Mon 11/03/08 11:39 PM
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pkd1220
Joined Thu 05/24/07
Posts: 1819
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| Tue 11/04/08 06:11 AM |
anything that's written from the heart is never wrong-I think its heartfelt and full of love for your little girl-what more can you ask? Wonderful job.
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txmomof2
Joined Fri 12/07/07
Posts: 37227
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| Tue 11/04/08 06:25 AM |
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QUOTE:
im not good, but ill take a wack at it, what do i got to loose, lol
The one, my world
Jayla we play in
the morning, we
play before the
zzz's
A piece I always
missed, the piece
you made complete
The spot you filled,
the spot I left
blank for a beautiful
little girl like you.
Alot of memories
from your first 2
years.
Best of all having
you lay next to me in
the morning's to watch
your "Bob Bob"
Memories I'll cherish
Memories I'll never
forget
Your the one that
made me
Your the one that
keeps me modivated
Our times together
will never end
Rain or sun shine,
we'll play through
them all again and again
Just remember daddy
will always be yours'
and you will always
BE MINE!
how is that, i dont feel im that good at writing them, lol. fix anything that may sound out of place or need fixed to sound better. what you all think
very good hun.
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LAMom
Joined Tue 12/12/06
Posts: 24116
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| Tue 11/04/08 07:05 AM |
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QUOTE:
im not good, but ill take a wack at it, what do i got to loose, lol
The one, my world
Jayla we play in
the morning, we
play before the
zzz's
A piece I always
missed, the piece
you made complete
The spot you filled,
the spot I left
blank for a beautiful
little girl like you.
Alot of memories
from your first 2
years.
Best of all having
you lay next to me in
the morning's to watch
your "Bob Bob"
Memories I'll cherish
Memories I'll never
forget
Your the one that
made me
Your the one that
keeps me modivated
Our times together
will never end
Rain or sun shine,
we'll play through
them all again and again
Just remember daddy
will always be yours'
and you will always
BE MINE!
how is that, i dont feel im that good at writing them, lol. fix anything that may sound out of place or need fixed to sound better. what you all think
Whoaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa you did it,, Wonderful write
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Wolfeyes58
Joined Tue 09/25/07
Posts: 5028
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| Tue 11/04/08 08:54 AM |
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I would like to take my shot at it...and she is so precious. Little redhead girl.
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Differentkindofwench
Joined Sat 04/07/07
Posts: 4425
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| Tue 11/04/08 09:16 AM |
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QUOTE:
im not good, but ill take a wack at it, what do i got to loose, lol
The one, my world
Jayla we play in
the morning, we
play before the
zzz's
A piece I always
missed, the piece
you made complete
The spot you filled,
the spot I left
blank for a beautiful
little girl like you.
Alot of memories
from your first 2
years.
Best of all having
you lay next to me in
the morning's to watch
your "Bob Bob"
Memories I'll cherish
Memories I'll never
forget
Your the one that
made me
Your the one that
keeps me modivated
Our times together
will never end
Rain or sun shine,
we'll play through
them all again and again
Just remember daddy
will always be yours'
and you will always
BE MINE!
how is that, i dont feel im that good at writing them, lol. fix anything that may sound out of place or need fixed to sound better. what you all think
I enjoyed this immensely. I've watched Sponge Bob more than most adults would care to admit as I have been given the privilege with a 2-and-a-half year old boy. There are certain scenes and characters that come flying to mind with this. Perhaps thinking of your relationship with your daughter and using Mr. Krabs and Pearl's relationship, even though your daughter is not a Whale, how you have a whale of a time with her and her reactions or special things you both do while watching and she knows you'll come in right on cue and the reaction you have when that smile of delight crosses her face or her gurgles of laughter. There is a lot of fun between Patrick and Sponge Bob you can play with here too. If I knew more about this, I'll gladly see if I can come up with a Parody for Daddy and Jayla with the theme song as you watch "who lives in a pineapple under the sea"!
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Wolfeyes58
Joined Tue 09/25/07
Posts: 5028
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| Tue 11/04/08 09:26 AM |
Denise, I finally took the time to read what you wrote and you have the flair and words for children. I loved it.
Pam, I never had the privilege with Spongebob as I have with Barney and his friends with my three girls. But now, my gf's two year old enjoys watching that yellow character, so it wouldn't take much to come with something, but I think two things are right, Dee's poem of what she wrote and what you said about what comes from the heart is the best no matter how you word it.
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LAMom
Joined Tue 12/12/06
Posts: 24116
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| Tue 11/04/08 09:28 AM |
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QUOTE:
Denise, I finally took the time to read what you wrote and you have the flair and words for children. I loved it.
Pam, I never had the privilege with Spongebob as I have with Barney and his friends with my three girls. But now, my gf's two year old enjoys watching that yellow character, so it wouldn't take much to come with something, but I think two things are right, Dee's poem of what she wrote and what you said about what comes from the heart is the best no matter how you word it.
Ohhhhhhhhh Robert Dear I wrote nothing,, I was commenting on the OP's write,,
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TxsGal3333
Joined Tue 09/05/06
Posts: 29986
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| Tue 11/04/08 10:04 AM |
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QUOTE:
im not good, but ill take a wack at it, what do i got to loose, lol
The one, my world
Jayla we play in
the morning, we
play before the
zzz's
A piece I always
missed, the piece
you made complete
The spot you filled,
the spot I left
blank for a beautiful
little girl like you.
Alot of memories
from your first 2
years.
Best of all having
you lay next to me in
the morning's to watch
your "Bob Bob"
Memories I'll cherish
Memories I'll never
forget
Your the one that
made me
Your the one that
keeps me modivated
Our times together
will never end
Rain or sun shine,
we'll play through
them all again and again
Just remember daddy
will always be yours'
and you will always
BE MINE!
how is that, i dont feel im that good at writing them, lol. fix anything that may sound out of place or need fixed to sound better. what you all think
Myself I would not touch a thing in your poem. You see words from the heart are just that words filled with love. One can never do any justice to words from the heart they should remain as is.
You did a wonderful job and it is very heartfelt. I myself could never touch her heart as your words have when she is old enough to read them and really understand them.
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tyhodge
Joined Fri 10/31/08
Posts: 189
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| Tue 11/04/08 10:46 AM |
thanks guys. i read all the replies. if working some character's into it, the only 2 she knows by name is bob bob and patrick.
i just always thought things never went together well, i will read them over and over and just feel little spots dont go together well or feel out of place.
just like in this spot:
"A piece I always
missed, the piece
you made complete
The spot you filled,
the spot I left
blank for a beautiful
little girl like you. "
does it sound better like:
"A piece I always
missed, the piece
you made complete
The spot you filled,
the spot I left
blank for a beautiful
little girl that Id like
to thank. "
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Differentkindofwench
Joined Sat 04/07/07
Posts: 4425
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| Tue 11/04/08 11:10 AM |
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QUOTE:
thanks guys. i read all the replies. if working some character's into it, the only 2 she knows by name is bob bob and patrick.
i just always thought things never went together well, i will read them over and over and just feel little spots dont go together well or feel out of place.
just like in this spot:
"A piece I always missed,
The spot you filled
and made complete
the spot left
blank for a beautiful
little girl like you. "
does it sound better like:
"A piece I always missed,
You are the piece
making my puzzled heart complete.
That spot left blank
For my beautiful little girl,
I will always thank.
Sorry, I played in a couple of spots and got lost where I was actually playing. Please note, the underlying beauty of what you're doing here comes through no matter how its phrased.
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